Thanksgiving day, we welcomed our daughter, Josephine Robin, into the world! I tried to take notes during labor and wrote up her birth story when it was fresh, but haven’t gotten a chance to post it (#newmomlife). This is going to be quite long, since Josie’s birth was anything but straightforward. Luckily, the birth was the hardest part and she’s an actual dream baby (so far!), but more on that later.

After our first IVF cycle failed, we met with our Reproductive Endocrinologist to follow up on how the cycle went and what our next steps were. We were very much on the same page, we were happy with how our cycle went right up until the negative pregnancy test. My response to the medication, egg retrieval, fertilization and maturation of the embryos was all pretty much textbook. We feel very lucky to have had such a positive experience.

Right after retrieval we were told that they had managed to collect 24 eggs. This seemed like a great number to me, and we expected to get a good haul as I was young and had responded to the medication well. Twenty-four seems like a huge number, and comparably it is, but during each stage of development, you can expect about 30% drop off. So from our 24 retrieved, not all would fertilize, and not all of those would develop, and not all of those would reach the 5-day blastocyst stage which is what’s required for transfer.

At the end of your stim phase, you’re given a different medication called a “trigger shot”. This is administered exactly 36 hours before your egg retrieval is scheduled and lets your ovaries know that it’s time to mature the eggs and prepare them for release. Before they are actually released, the procedure is performed to aspirate each of the eggs out of their follicles. The follicles have grown to be about 20mm at the largest, and usually at least 14mm if they are containing a mature egg, and they’ll continue to grow after the trigger shot, but the eggs themselves are still microscopic.

First, our medication arrived from a special fertility pharmacy. It arrived in an insulated box I could almost fit in. Needles and syringes and everything. The nurse warned us that the box would be big when she taught us how to administer the medication at our last appointment. It was still pretty overwhelming. Our box had several medications in it, some of which needed to stay refrigerated. According to my research, the first IVF cycle can be “diagnostic”, meaning the doctor will see how you respond to a standard dose and if you need to change dosages or protocols in a future cycle, you can adjust to try for a better outcome, meaning more mature eggs that fertilize normally.

Right before Thanksgiving, we met with our RE for a follow up appointment to discuss our test results and diagnosis and go over an IVF treatment plan. We decided that based on our results, we would go straight to IVF. There are a couple of less expensive and less invasive (and less successful) treatments that we could have tried first, but given the length of time we’ve been trying and the fact that our insurance coverage is great, we’re pulling out the big guns and going for it.

A few years ago, I got the worst highlights of my life. It was a “deal” that I got sucked into, ombre was at peak trend levels, and this junior stylist talked me into “ombre blonde highlights” which was basically orange streaks that started halfway down the length of my hair. It was the worst hair experience of my life, despite having been experimenting with various bangs for over a decade!

I left off our fertility story after we made our first appointment for a visit to a Reproductive Endocrinologist to figure out why we weren’t having any luck trying to conceive and what our possible options are moving forward. We chose Boston IVF/IVF New England, which used to be two separate organizations, but have merged into one. It’s honestly a bit confusing since there are so many office across Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, etc.

My makeup routine lately has been pretty simple and straightforward. Base, brows, lashes, lips and I’m out the door. I’ll do a bit more bronzing, concealing, or contouring here and there, but overall it’s a streamlined process. Since I’m using fewer products however, I am a bit more focused on getting the most out of them. When it comes to lip color, I like to put it on in the morning and forget about it until maybe after lunch, so a long-wearing lip is a must and these three formulas have been my go-to.

It can be relatively taboo to talk about fertility. I know for me at first, knowing we were having trouble getting pregnant felt like a personal failure, like I’d done something wrong or was somehow defective. Then I started thinking about it as any other health issue that you can’t control – acne, crooked teeth, nearsightedness, being left-handed (just kidding), and suddenly it didn’t seem like such a big deal. No one can control those things, and people use medicine and technology to fix them all the time.